The Voodoo That You Do So Well
by VengefulMoon
Summary: Voodoo was right. [Yzak and Dearka bashing included] [Twoshot] [Rated for swearing] Complete.
1. Yzak's Side

**Seran: Sorry if I'm stealing ideas, but Kira's about to murder Yzak!**

**Kira: Seran doesn't own us!**

**Seran: On with the show!

* * *

**The Voodoo That You Do So Well

Kira was walking down the street, when he came across a weird looking doll on the ground. It was made out of plastic and had Yzak's hair-do.

_This must be a voodoo doll._ Kira thought. _And it looks like Joule._

…Then an evil plot formed in his mind, despite the fact that he's good-natured. He ran back to the Clyne Manor, then grabbed a bed of nails and dropped the doll on it.

Meanwhile

Yzak was sound asleep, when his back felt like a million pushpins had been dug in. He screeched in agony and jumped out the bed, landing on his rear end.

"Ouch! What the fuck is going on here, some sort of voodoo?"

Voodoo was right.

At the Clyne Manor, Kira was still thinking of ways to beat up Yzak without getting caught by Lacus.

"What to do…"

He snapped his fingers and got a hammer. He then whacked the arm of the doll repeatedly.

Yzak felt like something heavy and powerful had broken his arm in half.

Then he put the doll in Mister Pink's mouth (if Haros have mouths).

Then Yzak felt like he was flying, as his head grazed the wall, his feet skidding along the floor.

Ezaria walked out of her room just in time to be shocked by what was happening to him and fainted.

Lacus saw what Kira was doing, but she let him continue, as it was amusing. Then she got in the act by grabbing the doll and tying it to the fan attached to the roof of her room.

Yzak was now spinning in circles.

Athrun, Flay and Cagalli also got in the mess by pulling certain parts of the doll off.

And Yzak had been dissected.

"What the fuck? Mom! Kira's playing around with a voodoo doll!"

Ezaria scoffed. "Well, you better help yourself. I'm going to help them beat some sense into you." And with that, she left.

She arrived at the Clyne Manor in 5 minutes with some needles.

Kira grabbed them and pushed the needles into the doll after reattaching the removed body parts.

And that's where the mayhem begins…

TBC

* * *

**Seran: 1 down, 1 to go!**

**Kira: Crap, you bashed Yzak!**

**Lacus: He sure did!**

**Yzak: And you loved it! Fuck you, idiots!**

**Seran: Shut up.**

**Everyone but Yzak: Later!**


	2. Dearka's Side

**Seran: Dearka's about to be pummeled by BOTH Kira and Shinn.**

**Kira and Shinn: (prepare the mallets)**

**Luna: I never expected those two to work together.**

**Stellar: Me neither.**

**Seran: I don't own anything. Now on with the fucking show!**

**Meyrin: Seran!

* * *

**

The Voodoo That You Do So Well: Dearka's Side

Shinn found an unusual doll on the floor while walking to Stellar's house.

"It looks like Elsman." He said to himself. His mind then cooked up an idea, and then it told him to call up Kira on his cell.

"Hey, Kira, I found a doll that looks like Dearka. Want me to help out with smashing him up?"

Kira merely shrugged on the other side of the line. "Sure, why not?"

Lacus yelled a slightly incoherent "I'll help too!" because of how far she was from Kira.

Shinn also heard Athrun scream "I'll take a crack at it, as well!", and he heard it quite well.

"Right, I'm headed over there right now." And with that, he turned his cellphone off and ran towards the Clyne Manor.

He arrived there a few minutes later, unaware that his sprinting caused Dearka to slip out of his bed and skidding towards one of the stone pillars that holds up the roof of his home.

Dearka slammed into said pillar. And he did it hard, too.

"Oof!"

He got up after a few seconds.

At the Clyne Manor, Shinn had put the Dearka doll on the table.

Kira grabbed a wrench and smacked the back of the doll with it.

…And Dearka, as a result, got bent outwards.

Flay helped out by punching the doll at the crotch, twisting it then smacking it on the head.

Dearka felt a searing pain at his down-there part, got twisted into a screw, and was forced to bite his tongue. He shuddered at the pain (if he could shudder in the position he was in).

Miriallia walked out the door to see what was going on, and saw her husband in a mix-up. She screamed and fainted as a result.

Stellar walked in, saw Kira and Shinn working together, and fainted for some reason that we're unlikely to understand.

Lacus grabbed the doll and threw it into the sky so hard it slammed into the PLANTs.

And Dearka crashed into Armory 1 as a result.

He screamed, "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?"

And my answer to that is: The Voodoo That You Do So Well.

* * *

**Seran: Ouch, now that's got to hurt.**

**Shinn: (high-fives Kira)**

**Flay: Wow, those two do pretty well as a team.**

**Meyrin: I agree.**

**Everyone: See you later!**


End file.
